The conscious desire to forgive those who hurt us is followed by an act of will. That reminds me of the statement, When there is a will,there is a way.
Sometimes forgiving others may require some level of humility on our part,burying our ego and putting away our reasons. It is an exercise in compassion.
I had a bitter experience 4 months ago. It was a misunderstanding between I and some other family friend.We had a family function and I had sent in my own fee through to her. She later called me that her bank rejected a particular denomination I gave her telling it to be a fake. After several explanation that i withdrew it from the bank also so i wouldn’t know if a fake denomination was in it. She was unperturbed instead wanted a replacement but i refused to because i knew how irrational and hasty she could be when taking decisions.She did not give up and kept calling me to make a move but I chose to disregard her because I knew i could be tempted to express my own frustrations too. I did not know that my decision was going to cause a pandemonium later on. There was a knock on the door and I peeped through the curtains to ascertain who it was. I saw her and knew trouble lurks around.
I opened the door and behold a stark-looking lady in front of me dangling a set of keys. “Hello Madam good evening. How may I help you ? I uttered. ” Who cares about your evening. I am here for an explanation on your carefree attitude.”She replied.Immediately,she began to throw tantrums around and was inconsolable. It went on for over an hour and she left in anger. I was dumbfounded. I wanted to give her a piece of my mind but was stopped by the hoot of a car entering the compound. I picked up the phone and put a call through to her Sister and lamented about her inactions tears rolling down my chubby cheeks.She promised to mediate afterwards.
Later in the day,I began to feel restless. The Holy spirit nudging my heart to forgive and let go of any hurts I may have felt. The Holy spirit further encouraged me to give her a call and apologise. What!!! I yelled. Apologise my foot. After all the shits she has caused. I am not making any move. I said to my self. Somehow after minutes of introspection,I called her and apologised. She was not moved at all by my humility rather she sounded so cold and hung the phone. It was somewhat painful to have received such a humiliation from her. But I did what was right and good by obeying the Holy Spirit and allowing God to judge.
I felt at peace afterwards and knew for sure that God was going to fight for me maybe sooner or later but I believe He will.