Do you have the ability to think,reason,and judge for yourself? Do you have a mind to trust? Do you defer to others most of the time? These are important questions to ponder as you continue to build a foundation for healthy self- esteem. Competence is like having internal security. You are self- reliant; you trust yourself to make good judgements and decisions and you allow yourself to make mistakes. Competence builds confidence. You know you are capable,well-grounded and saavy enough to overcome the obstacles that life presents.
We all feel overwhelmed and helpless from time to time. The Competent woman knows these situations are not permanent.She is proactive and uses her knowledge and ability to initiate solutions.
If you think you can do it that’s confidence, If you do it that’s Competence-Morris Code
When someone is over-reliant on others to make choices and he/she accepts their opinions,not allowing room to think independently,Then such person will find it hard to build competence. They will need to start thinking for themselves. Are you an independent thinker? Do your opinions matter? Are you in the habit of openly expressing yourself?
If you are struggling with feelings of insecurity and uncertainty, this can be frightening. The way to conquer the fear is to push through the anxiety and speak up anyway,believing that your opinions have value. If you keep practicing this,it will become easier. Eventually, it will be a habit that feels natural.
The test of true competence is the end result- L.Ron Hubbard
To keep this in perspective,it’s impossible to be competent in all areas of your life and you don’t need to be. I believe some motivational speakers and self-help gurus are doing women a disservice by telling them to always stay upbeat. That’s not the real world.
A woman who has been out of the job market for eight years may not feel competent re-entering the workforce. However,she really shines at managing the home. So do yourself a favor-lighten up,you can’t be great at everything. In a nutshell,here’s what will build the competence factor for you:
- Experience life fully-actively participate
- Understand that unexpected challenges teaches you resilience.
- Take responsibilty,think for yourself.
- Make your own choices and decisions.
- Improve your skills,keep learning
- Trust yourself
If you have children at home, take heed.Allow them to become decision-makers,let them take some risks and make mistakes. By so doing,you are letting them know that you believe in their abilities. Children who learn to be responsible for themselves build their own level of competence.
Competence is such a rare bird in those woods that i always appreciate it when i see it- Frank Underwood,House of Cards