Now,let’s be frank and real with ourselves. There’s a certainty that while growing up,you may have been wrongly adjudged by the people in your life probably because of your nasty behavior or perhaps,they find it hard to accept your individuality and so,they came up with self-inflicting words that in turn became labels.While most of these judgements aren’t intentional,it has carved a negative pattern in your life.
My question therefore is,what labels are you wearing?
While roles represent only a part of your life,and the same goes for labels.Labels don’t provide the total picture.However,wearing the wrong labels can change who you are at a core level,if you buy into them.
Sometimes,these labels can be imposed from the inside (self-talk),or externally,(by others).Now,have you been branded with any of these labels? Fat,ugly,skinny,numbskull,worthless,disorganized,careless,goody two shoes,or good-for-nothing? That’s only a small sampling-there’s a lot more than it.Sometimes,parents or peers can unwittingly pin these labels on us,and we retain them into maturity.Some of these old labels may need to be challenged and eliminated. Do you remember this rhyme?
Sticks and stones will break my bones
But names will will never hurt me.
The line, ” names will never hurt me” may sound good,but it’s a lie.Names can,and do hurt. So,be careful what you call people even if your excuse is, “I was only joking.” Nothing like a heavy dose of guilt to give your words impact! Sometimes,specific events cause us to place labels on ourselves.
Labels can also be connected to our health.My friend Joanne was totally attached to her ‘inability to have a baby’ label. Whenever she sat in a group,all she talk about is her status. Suprisingly,she did not lack an audience. I asked her oneday,what life would be like without being unable to get pregnant. Who would you be without your label? I would be a nobody,she replied. “People wouldn’t pay any attention to me.”
What labels are you carrying around? If there is a perceived payoff,they will be difficult to eliminate.Excavating the real you requires exploring,evaluating and eliminating your labels.
As Margaret Young says, “Often,people attempt to live their lives backward.They try to have more things or more money to do more of what they want, so they would be happier.The way it actually works is the reverse.You must first be who you really are,then do what you need to do inorder to have what you want.”