Dealing With Personal Insecurities

Personal Insecurities could be defined as a feeling of general unease or nervousness that may be triggered by perceiving of oneself to be vulnerable or inferior in some way, or a sense of vulnerability or instability which threatens one’s self-image or sense of pride.

Personal insecurity may be linked to mental health.One which needs to be dealt with once it is becoming a recurring decimal in a person’s life. It stems from childhood upbringing and one which goes on affecting the life of an individual till adulthood.

If as a child,you lacked parental love, attention,acceptance,and care,you are bound to develop insecurity issue. Infact,managing relationships is one hell of a problem. And you know what I mean by this.

There are many tell-tale signs you need to watch out for. But I will tell you ten(10) obvious ones.

1. You tend to clamp into your shell at any slightest provocation or misunderstanding from those in your life.

2. You find it hard to open up to those in your life(even when it’s expedience you do so) especially your significant other. Trust issues you say.

3. You seem to be envious of other people’s success stories.

4. You often demand validation or approval from people before you take a decision because you feel inadequate.

“Be careful not to mistake insecurity and inadequacy for humility! Humility has nothing to do with the insecure and inadequate! Just like arrogance has nothing to do with greatness.”

-C Joybell.C

5. You are an attention-grabber.

6. Your emotions always seem to be controlling you.

6. You find it difficult to take a stance and stand by it.

7. You are always raising expectations.

8. You are always afraid to express your feelings even when you know innately that you are hurting.

9. You always want to be like someone else. Inorderwords,you are not confident in your own skin.

“Our envy always lasts longer than the happiness of those we envy.”

– François Duc de La Rochefoucauld.

10. You are always filling the blank spaces in your relationships because you don’t know your value or worth enough.

Do you find yourself in any of those tell-tale signs above? If you do, don’t you worry,help is here. Let’s quickly get to the solution.

1. Let’s dive into the “W” and “H”.

“What is making me act this way?” You need to know the root cause of your problem. “Is there something triggering this attitude?” Maybe you remembered a particular ugly incident as a child or in your past relationships.

“How can I get rid of this negative vibe?” This is where the solution lies.

2. You have asked the Why and the How. Next,is for you to challenge your faulty/negative mindset. If this attitude has caused more harm than good to you and your relationships,then why should you continue to hurt yourself. Focus on how to reinvent the wheel.

3. Take back ownership of your life by telling yourself, “It’s okay to forgive and forget those who screwed me up in the past and move on with life.” “It’s okay to begin to love myself and accept all that I am without judgement”

4. I know this may be hard. But try and force yourself to be “free” for once. Share your feelings if it’s necessary and don’t always expect too much from people.

5. Try and take a stance for once and stand by it. It’s not going to hurt anyway.

6. Lastly,Find time for rejuvenation. Heal yourself of any disappointments,hurts or pains. Meditate more often and always practice positive affirmations each morning. This will help erode any negative energy that often accompanies personal insecurities.

“We all have our limitations, but when we listen to our critics, we also have theirs.”

– Robert Breault